Perfectly Imperfect…
Perfection is a dangerous word! And attempting to strive for perfection made this week a tough one. No one in my life has to put pressure on me, or set a incredibly high standard— I do that enough myself! I have always been that way. I don’t have to “compete” with others because my internal struggles for perfection are immense. I strive to be the best version of myself everyday, and let’s be honest, striving will get us no where; but it so easy to get lost in that mentality! Perfection striving pulls me in until I feel like I’m drowning. Eventually I throw my exhausted hands up and surrender, and ask the Lord to please just get me through whatever I’m struggling with.
Knowing all Along He never left me, in fact He went before me and made the way! An easy way that all I had to do was put one foot in front of the other and trust Him! I am writing this as a confession. For someone else out there that is also so tired of the strife! I feel you. I actually made myself sick this week because of all the worrying and sleepless nights. My body finally surrendered. And just when I thought I had made it through the week something unexpected happened at our new home.
Jason and I were so excited that our reclaimed beams were being delivered Thursday. The pretty finishes are finally starting to appear! We pulled up to the house and my stomach felt sick. The beams were here but they were all wrong. Wrong color and wrong patina. They were beautiful but not the look I was going for AT ALL. And I had no one to blame but myself. I probably picked these beams out 4 month ago and I never checked back with my wood guy about them again. It happens! You get so tired during a remodel or a new build that you just let things slip. You just want it done! And crazy enough the same thing happened the last time we built. The beams got stained the wrong color and we had to sand every last beam and redo them. We could not believe we were living this all over again. We had just gotten out of our mouths that we had nothing to do this weekend!! So what does my precious husband do? He buys a respirator and goes to work! Because I had been sick he would not let me help him. I honestly have no clue what I would do without Jason! He literally makes my ideas come to life! So after three days of sanding the beams are so beautiful I could cry! And just like our last house they will be a thing of beauty that we will admire for years to come. They are perfectly imperfect!
This week I would like to encourage you to stop striving for the unattainable, and extend yourself some grace. You are perfect in His sight because of Jesus. No striving needed.
2 Corinthians 12:9
“And he said unto me, my Grace is sufficient for thee: for my power is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”
